do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
