Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
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