Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Randomize
