can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
