What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
time to smoke my breakfast
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize