In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
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