I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
