I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Randomize
