I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
