Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize