nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Randomize
