apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Randomize