I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
