You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Randomize
