I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
