: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
