I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I love you. Go after that dick
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
