i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
