Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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