wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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