His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize