is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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