Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Randomize
