Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
