if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize
