We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I smell like Dick and happiness
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
