chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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