I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Randomize
