Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Text me some of your sweat
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
