So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize