I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
tell me about the fingering
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