My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
