fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
