I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
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