I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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