I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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