You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
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