its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
