i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Randomize