How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
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