o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
