so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
