I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Randomize
