so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
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