BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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