As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
