I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
