it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
