quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
