Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
