question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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